Geek Bear Inc.

Sleep Update: Temporary Win!

Sat, 06 Apr 2013 09:01:28 -0400

I had a full night of sleep for the first time in quite a while! sure, I was so exhausted prior to falling asleep I don’t think it was physically possible to even wake up from that. And I had some herbal help thar. But it’s a start!

Sometimes it’s good to be reminded that I can do this. And oh, my dreams were full of whack, but I can’t remember too well what they were about. I remember aliens, and someone had to go through an initiation and I was looking for the cure to someone’s heartbreak. Lol.

origin-of-frost: captaingumdrop: eachlittle-bird-that-sings: h...

Sat, 06 Apr 2013 08:55:11 -0400

origin-of-frost:

captaingumdrop:

eachlittle-bird-that-sings:

how do you cat?

you dont

cats dont logic

Cats aren’t bound by the laws of nature.

Cheesy burger à la Kro #OmNom

Fri, 05 Apr 2013 19:11:29 -0400

Cheesy burger à la Kro #OmNom

Sleep Anxiety: Sometimes it's not JUST in your head

Fri, 05 Apr 2013 18:11:37 -0400

I haven’t logged in to Tumblr for a few months, I think, ha! And of course, what brings me back is not the endless stream of things to browse - don’t get me wrong, I could get lost there, I just, well, I know better, lol. But one more introspective rant/ramble about sleep, insomnia, issues, and anxiety. Because sometimes that neat little package is more than what can effectively be handled.

Have you ever found yourself waking up in the middle of the night with your mind in such a haze, you kind of feel like you haven’t slept at all, or you’re not quite awake? Or lying awake, tossing and turning, exhausted beyond belief, so, so tired, yet seemingly without the ability to pass out? Every little thing, movement, noise, they grate your gears. You feel yourself becoming gradually anxious, aggressive, heck, you would punch whatever it is preventing you from that sweet respite if you weren’t feeling so dang leaden all over from the un-sleepiness state of awakening you’re stuck in. That, and you know better than to blame everything around you. You know very well you are your own and very single source of woes. But the more you try, the worse it gets. You become so agitated your mind begins to make you hallucinate. You know you’re not dreaming, because you still receive all those signals around you - water pipes creaking, raindrops plopping on your window, cats snuggling against you or worse, grooming at the foot of your bet. You just drift in and out of consciousness, will yourself to check the time only to find out what you thought was a couple hours of blissful unconsciousness was actually a mere 5 minutes interruption. One where you had such stressful imagery (in my case, it’s often things I do daily, like programming, or making food on the run, or chasing down buses, it’s always stuff that streamlines and never ends) going through your lil’ noggin’ you’re basically less rested than you were before you went to bed a few hours ago

After a few nights of this, the anxiety reaches a certain peak where you’re actually scared to try to go to bed. You’d rather stay up doing things and not having to face that monster. Maybe if you’re lucky you’ll pass out on the couch for a couple minutes? Because at this point you basically start getting anxiety or panic attacks from not being able to sleep. And those wake you up for real. And then you’re worse off….

I know people who can slip in and out of their sleep without as much as a blink. One minute they’re grumbling at me for waking them up, they roll over, and bam! They’re already snoring and back in Neverland. Whereas on a good day, it takes me 15-20 minutes to fall asleep, and go back to sleep once I’ve awoken. They can do fine on as little as 5 hours of sleep a night. They don’t simply jerk awake from the slightest unusual movement or sound.

Yet here I am, stuck with a sleep schedule that needs to be near perfectly timed to be effective. I have to wake up super early and workout or exercise a minimum during the day. I have to block out noises with earplugs to fall asleep. For a while I couldn’t even fall asleep without some very, very quiet music in the background. (Sometimes even the minimal volume setting is too loud, tho :/). If I get sick, pulled out of my routine for whatever reason, or simply just a smidge bit too stressed, it all goes to hell. And from there on, if I don’t find a way to fix it, it’s one heck of a downward spiral into hell.

i’ve seen a therapist last year concerning these issues. I’ve tried every single trick in the book. I know what to avoid, and how. And heck, I even tried medicine (which was a really awful fiasco, by the way. I hope I never have to take anti-depressants, ever. Because that shit messed me up pretty bad even though I was on the smallest dose possible. But let’s not deviate too much, my fear of doctors and meds is another topic altogether). Natural supplements.

The problem is: I don’t always have control over all of those things. I can’t predict I’m going to get sick, and I can’t magically heal in a day. I have a hard time sleeping which makes it longer to heal which makes me sleep even worse, and yeah. If we had a map with the red X labelled “You are here”, this is where it would be stamped.

So what can I do, aside from dealing? Stuffing myself with caffeine to get through the day, because the world doesn’t stop turning for my sleep issues, even though I know it might actually make the problem worse because, wired?

It’s a hill to climb. I could have worse issues, really. And eventually things go back to normal and I can get a grip and slowly fix it. It just has a tendency to get wrecked up all over again shortly after I manage to get everything in order, but that’s life, right? I wish I had a contingency plan.

In fact, that was the main reason I began writing this post. I figured if I laid it all out, wrote it down, there would be one of those genius sparks just flying out of my head and giving me all the answers. Or the beginning of one, at the very least. Maybe it’ll come to me after I *sic* sleep on it. In the mean time I’m just going to get started on my recovery plan: gotta workout now that I’m not all sniffly and weak anymore!

Some will say “food for thought” but in my case,...

Mon, 25 Feb 2013 07:15:50 -0500

Some will say “food for thought” but in my case, I’ll call this one “Fuel for the day” :) #KroTakesFoodPics

Haha, kinda true xD

Sun, 10 Feb 2013 07:59:22 -0500

Haha, kinda true xD

The clothes you wear don’t determine your gender The clothes you wear don’t determine your...

Sat, 09 Feb 2013 23:58:46 -0500

The clothes you wear don’t determine your gender

The clothes you wear don’t determine your gender

The clothes you wear don’t determine your gender

The clothes you wear don’t determine your gender

The clothes you wear don’t determine your gender

The clothes you wear don’t determine your gender

The clothes you wear also don’t determine your sexual orientation

The only thing that clothes determine is whether or not you are naked.

Thank you!

thenightrune: r u kidding me Haha, that’s what happens...

Sat, 09 Feb 2013 07:18:52 -0500

thenightrune:

r u kidding me

Haha, that’s what happens when you stick characters with different ALIs together. They will initially try to balance out. I learned that the hard way.

She won’t do anything else. I’ve tried to take her outside, she...

Fri, 08 Feb 2013 18:31:21 -0500

She won’t do anything else. I’ve tried to take her outside, she doesn’t like the outdoors so she won’t run around. She doesn’t like cat toys, she doesn’t like catnip. Anything normal that cats like she just doesn’t like. (x)

Dawwwwww

Undressed Skeleton: 12 Lighter Homemade Pop-Tarts!

Fri, 08 Feb 2013 10:53:49 -0500

Undressed Skeleton: 12 Lighter Homemade Pop-Tarts!:

undressedskeleton:

As a kid and during my zero money college period, I turned to Pop-tarts a lot. There are 400 calories in a single packet. 400 calories is okay for breakfast but these calories were coming from fat, carbs and sugar. They contain little protein, fiber or other important nutrients. I decided to…

I need to make a high protein version of these somehow =D

February Melancholy

Wed, 06 Feb 2013 18:22:03 -0500

naminational:

I know many people lament the fact that Valentines (or singles awareness day) is upon us. And in light of that, I would like to ask people, celebrate the love you have (single or not), and celebrate yourself. You are an amazing person, despite what you and society tells you.

The Nami has it right! Love yourself! Love your family! Love your cats! Love everybody!!!

Kro Plays Fire Emblem: Stahl's birthday edition

Tue, 05 Feb 2013 20:42:00 -0500

Go figure, Most of my characters barely have any supports yet my character is A support with both Stahl (their A support is cute! Haha) and Chrom. And the other A is Virion and Sully. lol.

I’ve started combining my units a lot more, too. It’s easier to move around 4 tanks than 8 slightly weaker units, for one thing. Also, most pair ups give a speed boost that gives me 2 attacks against everything. Whoever thought that system up has my love, it’s much more useful and fun than the rescue thing from previous games!

Now can anyone explain to me what is the point of skills? You have 5 slots and gain a new one every 10 levels as far as I’ve observed, but you can’t transfer them between people. :| Why would I want to unequip one, exactly?!

Sooo. I have a fellow Stahl fan, nice to meet you. :D I have a tiny head canon that Stahl is the the bastard brother of Frederick, because if you tilt your head to the right and compare the two, they KINDA look alike. ANYWAYS, recruit Donnel later, when you have some skills AKA Rallies (and that Stahl is stronger, so you can stick him on the villager). Strength, Speed, Spectrum, and Defense are amazing for the poor fool. What mode are you playing on? I finished Normal and I am going onto Lunatic

Tue, 05 Feb 2013 16:42:59 -0500

They do kinda look alike. Daaang!

And I actually ended up doing that, without waiting to be stronger. And then Donnel’s just been sitting on the bench since cuz I can’t be bothered to level him up yet. I kinda wanna play through the story a bit and have little time to play.

I decided to start on Normal and kind of regret it because it’s kind of easy so far (I do play with permadeath. WHO DOESN’T?!). Maybe that’s why I get those crazy level ups all the time…

I feel like it’s about time I contribute some fanart to the Fire Emblem community again. Main...

Tue, 05 Feb 2013 10:19:32 -0500

I feel like it’s about time I contribute some fanart to the Fire Emblem community again. Main subject will be Stahl. Throw suggestions my way for poses/themes/special items/other characters and I’ll try to include it all!

Rofl, apparently I’m not the only one with a crush on...

Mon, 04 Feb 2013 20:24:10 -0500

Rofl, apparently I’m not the only one with a crush on Stahl! XD

little baby sick burns: oh so i’m one of the lucky people who got fire emblem awakening last...

Mon, 04 Feb 2013 19:25:49 -0500

little baby sick burns: oh so i’m one of the lucky people who got fire emblem awakening last...:

cakesize:

oh so i’m one of the lucky people who got fire emblem awakening last monday

i started out one playthrough without realizing that you don’t have to permanently bench units if you haven’t had them in rotation for a while, just get those reeking boxes in a low level area and bam, they’re back in the…

Oh, that’s weird. Sumia is my second best unit aside from Chrom and Tactician. (Stahl being #1 <3 lol). i guess that’s the RNG’s decision =P

It’s fun to not have to decide who your end party will be like right away. But knowing myself, I will end up leveling everyone to max level eventually. Or well, try to!

Is it just me...

Mon, 04 Feb 2013 16:12:16 -0500

Or are the character’s feet realy, really tiny in FE Awakening? It kinda looks like they’re sunken through the floor :/

fuckyeahlaughters: coverme-in-chocolate: nunubunkie: adriofthe...

Mon, 04 Feb 2013 07:37:28 -0500

fuckyeahlaughters:

coverme-in-chocolate:

nunubunkie:

adriofthedead:

jerakeenc:

HUMAN! CAN’T DO IT MYSELF! HELP!

I love this cat. He’s like, “omg please do the thing. do the thing where you touch my head andAAAA YES THANK YOUUUU”

this is my favorite cat gif

D’awwwww! Morning cuteness overload!

I have a new Fire Emblem Character Crush!

Sat, 02 Feb 2013 12:33:00 -0500

And his name is Stahl!

He gets the best level ups! And I love his personality so far! Made me chuckle when he first said something about being hungry. I’m afraid that’s gonna become a FE staple lol. But anyway. I love my Stahl! ^^

Have to say though, I liked the old artist better. It’s pretty, but the characters just don’t look that friendly for the most part. And they’re kinda… dull-looking. Even Vaike looks too tame for his personality.

Kro plays Fire Emblem Awakening

Sat, 02 Feb 2013 09:02:50 -0500

And as is the usual, the RNG makes me ragequit… 1% chance of crit for Chrom (why didn’t they leave the K???) Where he would reduce the boss to 2 hp without it so Donnel could get his level up… And the crit happens -_-’ fuuuuuuuuuuuuuu